2022 - A Year in Review
For those that have been following my posts for any length of time, you may remember in my very first post where I posted my list of items titled "What do I want?". Feel free to read the post here.
For 2022, I decided to focus on the following items :
Consistency in training of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu
Hit my goal weight by January 1, 2023
Becoming debt free by 12-31-2023
Read at least 5 books annually
I didn't believe these were lofty, nearly impossible goals - at least at the time. In this post, I want to review each item on the list and discuss my plan(s) for each in 2023 and beyond. Let's start with good to…maybe not so much.
Read at least 5 books annually
I didn't really set any other parameters on this one. I've never been a big reader, and I've put a lot of books down over the years because they didn't 'grab me' from the very beginning. I think I've done myself a huge disservice over the years with this thought process, and perhaps missed out on a great number of excellent reads.
I made the decision to try and make establishing this new habit as easy as possible, so I started with a book I knew I would enjoy - I had just finished The Terminal List by Jack Carr, so I decided to immediately jump into the second book - True Believer.
After finishing True Believer, I didn't want to stick with a single author, at least initially. I was concerned that I would fall back into the same pattern of not sticking with a book past the first chapter, so I decided to read a non-fiction book. It just so happened that around the time I was looking for my next read, I heard a highlight from an episode of the Joe Rogan Experience podcast, where Joe was interviewing David Goggins. From listening to that highlight, I went back and listened to the entire episode and found Mr. Goggins and his story very inspiring; this led me to purchasing a copy of his book Can't Hurt Me.
As an aside, I'm currently in the middle of book #12 for 2022 ( or perhaps Book #1 of 2023 )- David's follow-up Never Finished.
I can say one thing about establishing this new habit - I've now adopted a new habit of sticking with a book through the end of Chapter 2, at a minimum. Establishing this new pattern allowed me to by enlightened about how the human body burns calories in Herman Pontzer's book Burn.
I do tend to do most of my reading in the evenings and before bed. One thing I have noticed is that after starting this new habit, my quality of sleep has improved dramatically. I can't say that it's purely because of reading more consistently; I would make the argument its partially because of this habit along with improving my fitness and eating habits.
One last point here - all books I read are paperback or hardback physical books. During the initial 'trial' of this new habit I was primarily reading eBooks through either the Kindle or Barnes and Noble Nook app on my tablet, which I found had a negative impact on my ability to fall asleep more easily. You mileage may vary here, but there are some interesting findings around blue light from electronic devices are you are winding down for the day.
Consistency in training of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu
To be completely transparent, this one was easy. GJJ is not only one of my forms of physical activity, but regular training encourages me to maintain and/or improve other aspects of a healthier lifestyle. As I mentioned in my previous post When a Lack of Self-Discipline Smells…Bad, my goal at the time was to train consistently three times a week. I can happily say that I was able to establish that habit early in 2022, and have maintained it. My new goal is to increase that number to four times a week - while I'm excited about the potential for extra training time, I do have some concerns about the extra time required and what sacrifices will have to made to meet this new goal ( time away from family, etc. ). I am, however, fortunate that my wife is very supportive of my training, and has experienced first-hand the positive benefits I continue to receive from consistent training.
One of the biggest lessons that I continue to receive on the mat is that consistency in training doesn't always mean speed of results. Unfortunately I had very high expectations of my progress when I first began this new habit - I've had to reframe those expectations, and aim for a level of success I've talked about more than once in posts. If I can walk off the mat at the end of a training session and honestly say I am 1% better than I was when I stepped on the mat at the beginning, then the session was a success.
On a side note, one of my proudest moments of 2022 was in March - I was awarded my first stripe on my blue belt.
Hit my Goal Weight by January 1, 2023
I have always struggled with my weight, and have never been proud of my physique. I can't remember the last time I went outdoors without a shirt on, even when enjoying time at the pool or on the beach, because I was embarrassed by my waistline and my lack of any kind of muscle definition, especially around my chest and torso.
Last year, as I saw turning 50 on the horizon, the reality of getting older really began to sink in and I knew I had to make some changes if I wanted to be able to enjoy my remaining years and live them in the healthiest and most active way possible.
I'm very fortunate to have a really good relationship with my primary care physician, and have established a good open dialogue around all aspects of my health. During one of our conversations, we established a weight goal of 245 lbs. At the time, that would mean an 85 lb. reduction in weight as well as a significant reduction in my waist circumference. After the conversation, as many of us have I set some very strict rules for myself around diet restriction and exercise. The first 3-4 days were tough, but tolerable; unfortunately there was 'the slip'. I'm sure it was probably dessert related ( which has always been my Achilles heel ); in the past, this would normally be where I would fall of the wagon completely, feel sorry for myself and go back to the exact same habits that got me into my current position. Thankfully I had the foresight to message my doctor, and tell him what had happened, how I was feeling and ask for some advice. I was surprised by his advice : "OK, so you made a mistake. Cool. Just start again, and work to do a little better next time."
I wouldn't necessarily say it was 'forgiveness' he was offering - more of a reminder that what I was trying to do wasn't necessarily an 'all or nothing' endeavor. At the end of the day, I'm still human and I'm going to make mistakes. Don't continue to beat myself up over them and continue to strive for improvement.
One thing this endeavor has taught me is to pay closer attention to my body, especially when I'm craving something. I will ask myself what else am I feeling in the moment? Am I stressed about something? Stress is one of my biggest 'poor diet decision' triggers, and so I'm working harder to be aware of not only how I'm feeling but my environment ( did someone bring doughnuts in that morning, etc. ).
I would also say one other change that has helped me tremendously is to find fitness options that I enjoy. Jiu-jitsu is a big part of this, but I have also found workout plans that force me to not only invest maximum physical but also engage me mentally to get through the workout. As an example, one of my current fitness goals is to complete a Murph CrossFit workout ( read more about the workout and the Murph Challenge here ). I created a prep program for myself to work my way up to the workout in its strict form, using resistance bands to help me complete the pull-ups while I continue to build strength in my back. As I continue through my program, I reduce the resistance until I'm able to do the required set of strict pull-ups.
I am proud to say that while I haven't met my target yet, I am down over 43 lbs. and continue to make solid progress.
Becoming debt-free by December 31, 2023
This goal has, at least so far, proven to be the most and frustrating.
I could make a lot of excuses about the current global economic state, rising prices and underperforming investments across the board or any other host of excuses. The reality is, at the end of the day I have to be able to control what I can control ( there are so many aspects in life where this statement rings true ) and one thing I can control is how much money is flowing out.
I have not done a good job of this.
I've also realized how much stress this was really causing. Communication between my wife and I, when it came to money and spending, would become very strained and I found that I would walk around for several hours with a giant mental weight on my shoulders.
As an aside, I mentioned the word "control" in the previous paragraph - I sometimes have to reframe what that word means to me. In situations like this, I will occasionally get the thought in my head that if I "clamp down" and take complete control of the family's money and spending I can fix everything. It just doesn't work, in the long-term.
In situations like this, I have to remind myself of a couple of things :
My version of the classic quote : This too shall pass, with the correct focus and changes
I have already have access to the most powerful tool available : data
Over the course of 2-3 days, I sat down with my banking portal and MINT.com and did a deep dive into my family's spending over the previous 6 months. During this deep dive, I discovered we were spending an exorbitant amount of money on food - both eating out and groceries. By simply setting a budget on these two spending targets, we will potentially be able to save more than $1000 a month. The goal is then to taking as much of those savings as possible and redirect it towards our first debt payoff target.
I fully expect to make additional discoveries as I continue to review our spending data, and we will continue to adjust as we go along. This has also acted a reminder that this exercise is not a 'one and done' scenario - your finances are something that will continue to morph and change over a lifetime.
One other mistake that I made is not communicating my goals, the value this could provide for all of us and getting the family involved in the steps to meet those goals. Unfortunately I have a bad habit at times of attempting to "shoulder the load" entirely on my own, and not asking for help. Perhaps one of these days I will learn that it's not a character weakness to ask for help…
Overall
If I had to give myself a grade for my progress towards the goals list above, I'd give myself a solid "C". I definitely made some progress, and even accomplished two of my goals. I feel a great deal of pride in those accomplishments.
That being said, I have a great deal of room for improvement. I didn't maintain the focus that I needed to on the family's finances, and didn't get the family involved as I should have. In regards to my weight and fat loss management, I focused too much on exercise and not enough on nutrition. I now realize there is more to it than just "don't eat the doughnut" - I can pay attention to my mood and how I'm feeling in general.
One other change to my plan is to shorten my list of goals for 2023, so that can maximize my focus on the points that are the MOST important :
Increase weekly GJJ training sessions to four times a week
New Target date for hitting my goal weight : 31-October-2023
Improvements to financial strategy for 2023 :
Payoff targets for high interest debt, and check-in dates for meeting certain smaller targets to reflect progress or pivot
Consolidate saving targets into accounts that are more beneficial ( higher interest or dividend returns, etc. )
By setting check-in date and targets, this will allow me to verify I am using the correct strategy for both my weight loss and financial plans. Based on those check-in targets, I can then pivot if needed or continue on with my current plan.
Needless to say, regardless of my successes and failures in 2022 I'm very excited for 2023. I genuinely believe big things are to come from my family and I.
The future is yours, Noble Alpha. Build your plan and go forward…
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